Nancy
Pelosi, Barack Obama, and Harry Reid have just passed a new law called:
"The P.O.R. Affordable Boat Act" declaring that every citizen MUST
purchase a new boat, by April 2014.
Discussions
of the Bill were kept secret from the public and the Republican caucus of
Congress. The vote for passage was along party lines with all DemocRATS voting
in favor and all Republicans voting in opposition.
Barack
Obama said that the Republicans, being the Party of Nope, clearly can’t see the
advantages of affordable boat ownership for ALL Americans and would just as clearly
have been obstructionists throughout the legislative process had they been
allowed to participate. “I welcome good ideas about affordable boat ownership
from anyone, including Republicans, but they have none (good ideas).!”, he
added.
These "affordable" boats are available in Bronze, Silver, or Gold versions and will range in price from $50,000 - $125,000 - $350,000 respectively. The price does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.
Nancy Pelosi, minority leader of the House of Representatives, said, “This law has been passed, because until now, only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. This new law ensures that every American can now have an "affordable" boat of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to a new boat.”.
Though the costs of owning a boat will increase on average of 250% - 500% per year principally because of new taxes to be imposed and due to the limited number of Marinas and Docks, it is important that all Americans purchase boats in order to keep the long term future rate of cost increases of new boats under control. Subsidies of tax dollars will be available to those who presently can’t afford to buy “affordable” boats IF their incomes fall below certain levels. To offset these subsidies new taxes will be imposed upon the wealthy. In this way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain.
These "affordable" boats are available in Bronze, Silver, or Gold versions and will range in price from $50,000 - $125,000 - $350,000 respectively. The price does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.
Nancy Pelosi, minority leader of the House of Representatives, said, “This law has been passed, because until now, only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. This new law ensures that every American can now have an "affordable" boat of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to a new boat.”.
Though the costs of owning a boat will increase on average of 250% - 500% per year principally because of new taxes to be imposed and due to the limited number of Marinas and Docks, it is important that all Americans purchase boats in order to keep the long term future rate of cost increases of new boats under control. Subsidies of tax dollars will be available to those who presently can’t afford to buy “affordable” boats IF their incomes fall below certain levels. To offset these subsidies new taxes will be imposed upon the wealthy. In this way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain.
In a bid
to court political support from young voters the law has provisions that permit
children up to the age of 26 to be able to use their parent’s boats – but by
their 27th birthday they must purchase new boats for themselves.
Obama in an earlier speech promised, "... if you already have a boat, you can keep yours as well as your present Marina or favorite dock, period!". White House staffers quickly issued a press release saying that what Obama meant to say was that if you already own a boat you can keep it or your favorite Marina or dock provided they meet under the new law all government standards, which have yet either to be formulated or disclosed.
Obama in an earlier speech promised, "... if you already have a boat, you can keep yours as well as your present Marina or favorite dock, period!". White House staffers quickly issued a press release saying that what Obama meant to say was that if you already own a boat you can keep it or your favorite Marina or dock provided they meet under the new law all government standards, which have yet either to be formulated or disclosed.
If you
don't want or don't need a boat, you are required to buy one anyway. If
you refuse to buy one or can't afford one, you will be fined $800 annually until
you purchase one or face imprisonment.
Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the desert; ghettos; inner cities or areas with no access to lakes or other navigable waterways are not exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire to own a new boat are not acceptable excuses for not using your boat.
A government review board comprised of members who aren’t required to know the difference between the port, starboard or stern of a boat or boating in general will decide everything, including when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your boat along with how many people may ride in your boat and determine if any individual is too old or unhealthy enough to be able to use a boat. They will also decide if your boat has outlived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories or a newer and more expensive boat.
Those that can afford yachts will be required to purchase them. However these “Platinum” versions, though no longer optional for wealthy individuals, will also carry a much higher excise tax because they are “luxury” versions.
Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the desert; ghettos; inner cities or areas with no access to lakes or other navigable waterways are not exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire to own a new boat are not acceptable excuses for not using your boat.
A government review board comprised of members who aren’t required to know the difference between the port, starboard or stern of a boat or boating in general will decide everything, including when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your boat along with how many people may ride in your boat and determine if any individual is too old or unhealthy enough to be able to use a boat. They will also decide if your boat has outlived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories or a newer and more expensive boat.
Those that can afford yachts will be required to purchase them. However these “Platinum” versions, though no longer optional for wealthy individuals, will also carry a much higher excise tax because they are “luxury” versions.
The
government will also decide the name for each boat.
Failure
to comply with these rules will result in fines and possible imprisonment.
It should be noted that all federal officials, politicians, and many federal employees are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they and their families can obtain boats free from government warehouses, at the expense of tax payers. Large Labor Unions, Financial Companies and mega Corporations that have previously contributed to the DemocRATic Party are also exempt if they go through the formality of applying for exempt status.
It should be noted that all federal officials, politicians, and many federal employees are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they and their families can obtain boats free from government warehouses, at the expense of tax payers. Large Labor Unions, Financial Companies and mega Corporations that have previously contributed to the DemocRATic Party are also exempt if they go through the formality of applying for exempt status.
Asked to
comment on the new law, Harry Reid, Senate Majority Leader and the largest Pork
Barrel spending hog in the Congress said, “Affordable Boats has until now been
just a dream of progressives everywhere for 100 years. You know, I just love
America” ….
(adapted from unknown author)
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